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| 07:02pm 19/10/2008 |
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SO life has changed a lot. I feel like I have two worlds that don't match up. I have my life in Durham where I have many friends who I can just go to Ninth St and see with out having to worry about meeting up with them or plans and such. Then in Asheville life seems completely different. I have two good friends and I spend lots of time with and really care about them but my circle of friends seems very closed off and I want to branch out. I think now that I have come to terms with this eventually I will create more friends, but right now most of the people I know are acquaintances and I say hi and get a hug, then move on. So yeah its really hard and strange to juggle these two worlds and I feel like while I am in one the other slips no matter how hard I try to keep in touch with people.
schools a bitch too much work and I hate writing papers. my 2D drawing class is alright but I am very much a 3D artist not a 2D. I think is kinda ridiculous to how many classes and time I have to spend to get a degree that is going to pay me barely anything. |
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| 08:44pm 16/09/2006 |
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so yeah short hair picture |
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| 10:26pm 03/07/2006 |
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I have an amazing girlfriend. I couldn't ask for anyone better. Thank you! |
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| 11:48am 25/06/2006 |
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truely an amazing weekend. the play went pretty well. getting to see abbe again was incredible. Almost getting locked in a church, wow we are so good! Anyways in other words I am just really happy, things are looking a little better than they did before. |
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| 12:12am 19/06/2006 |
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So I graduated highschool.
I got a job that I am working at about 5 days a week.
I've lost contact with a couple people and gain contact with others.
Went skinnydipping with my friends.
And missed someone.
Honestly I'm not that fun to be around right now. I dont give a shit about anything. There are only like a select few people I am interested in hanging out with and half the time I just want to be alone reading, writting, sitting, thinking. Something that doesn't involve people.
My sunburn had almost run its corse my backs almost done peeling which was kinda nasty but o well it amused me.
I have health insurance.
I dont understand why people I thought cared dont have the time to ask how I am any more, but then again its not like I have the time much either.
I guess this is just one of my lovely bitchy posts it's really late for me tonight since I have to be at work at 7am today I guess.
7 - 3 what a lovely shift. What the hell am I supose to do after that. |
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| 11:11pm 25/05/2006 |
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So what to say...I dont know really I just bored right now.
Had some weird run ins with people at Francesca's all weird in a good way so that was cool. I like it there is a nice place. Just sitting outside talking with random people its all really nice. I think I might cut my hair shorter, Tula said she would cut it for me so that might happen this weekend. Also I get to clean my room this weekend for all of you who havent; seen my room its a disaster zone so maybe I will find some things I have been missing.
I am so worn out and tired of school. I am deffinatly looking forward to working at duke school next year and also looking forward to no homework adn being able to relax a bunch or at least not stressing over school hopefully. I love andrea for finding me a graduation cap and tassle so now as long as I pass my classes I can graduate. God I love most everyone I have hung out with this year they are just hte coolest bunch of kids.
Erica leaves on saturday...this is devestating and its just really been hitting me this week about how much she means to me and how much I love her. Its going to be awful not having her around. So Erica thank you so much for all the good times we will have to have plenty more when you come visit me and everyone else in this area.
THis week has been fucking weird.
I'm hopeing this saturday works out but I have to not let my hopes up too high cause then they tend to just get crushed. |
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| 07:34am 19/05/2006 |
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So I just have to make it to summer...thats going to be kinda hard cause now I will be wishing everyday to be summer and it will only make the days go slower. |
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| 08:32pm 16/05/2006 |
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so I have to get a job so I can make money and do stuff. However I dont want to do the retail thing again cause I just did a year and a half of that. Please any suggestions woudl be muchly appreciated. |
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| 11:04pm 07/05/2006 |
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Today was beautiful. |
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| 10:52pm 30/04/2006 |
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mood:  giddy
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so this weekend I went to my first contra dance weekend it went something like this
arrive about 11:30pm thursday night
wake up around 8am
help decorate till 2pm
nap till 4pm
parking duty till 8 + amazing dinner that lauren brought down for us
dance till 11pm
SLEEP
8am dance
workshops all day long on contra dances and waltz's
nap in the sun so i burned (oops)
contra dance from 8 till 11 then swing dance till late
more sleep
morning waltz
end contra dance
pack up and leave
it was an amazing weekend so much dancing so much joy. all of sunday I danced the guys part which is tons of fun. The bands that played were amazing and we even had a professional cook to cook us meals that were also amazing. The only sucky part was the water was nasty but we got gallons of water before hand so we didn;t have to drink icky stuff. I cant wait until the next contra dance this saterday even though its not a weekend even a dance is fun and I got to know some more people a little bit better. Anyways it was an amazing weekend and since I volunteered adn helped with setting up and parking I got to go for free!!!i am so looking forward to more of these! |
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| 04:48pm 09/04/2006 |
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so I'm debating takign a year off from school. maybe saving up some money so I wont be overwhelmed by being broke and starting school. I can probably get a job as teh art assistant at Duke School and maybe go an get anoth job for the days I dotn work at there. So yeah this is just an idea. right now I feel really burned out from school and and year of fun work would be nice and then I would go to ECU if they still like me then. right now this idea sounds really good, but who knows things coudl change somehow and I really have no idea. |
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| 09:33pm 06/04/2006 |
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mood:  I hate Bush
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Mr. Berry an art teacher at my school goes to Iraq this weekend. He is going to be training Iraqi (sp) troops for 18 monthes. If anything happens to him god help Bush if I ever see that man. Mr. Berry means so much to the kids he teaches and the staff at the school. It was be a great loss if he doesn;t come back. SO yeah I hope in 18 monthes there will be a big homecomign party for him. |
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| ranting... |
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| 07:36pm 02/04/2006 |
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mood: pissed off
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So wow thanks mom for ruining my spring break. So I am hanging out with my grandparents and my step mom and dad and my mom calls. She is all like I need you to sign you taxes since your 18. Lovely this means I either had to go to ehr house or have her come over here. So I decided to have her come here. I get Montez (my snake) out since I know she hates snakes just as a cautionary thing cause I dont want her close to me at all. So she comes in and is all like nice and friendly with my grandparents and then I start signing my forms. And she is liek well is Carolyn home cause I would like to talk to her. So Carolyn comes over and Mom starts showign off her CD that she just made and is like this is soo great I am soo amazing and she DOESN'T SHUT UP. I had finished signing and I just wanted her to leave I mean ever seeing her pisses me off soo much that her beign in the house just I so wanted to hit her or something to cause her pain. And she is standign in the fucking hallway gloating about her music and art and stuff that I just want to say fuck off. Its just so aggravating. And it doesn't help that I keep getting reminded of her all the time. I mean when was helping at reptile day there was this guy who had helped her with her CD cover. And then I had to send taxes to her. And then in Wilmington I ran into the suday school advisor at my old church whotalked to me for liek a fuckign hour and pestered me about getting back in contact with my mom. So yeah this overwhelming sense of rage has completely fucked up the afternoon part of my day and I cant seem to shake it off. |
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| so spring break didn't suck for once... |
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| 05:00pm 01/04/2006 |
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mood:  peaceful
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this week I been down isn wilmington hanging out with Mike, Kitty and Terry. Had a very fun time down there so thank you guys for beign so awesome. Actually went to the beach so that also was very pretty and fun. So now my grandparents are here to celebrate my birthday. I deffinatly think this is the best spring break I have every had. |
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| Birthday |
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| 10:34pm 26/03/2006 |
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mood: content
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So yeah my parents left me to go to colorado this weekend over my birthday. So I had a couple peopel over and it was really awesome. Friday Carryn picked me up to take me to school and made me a chocolate cake with peanut butter iceing which was pretty good especially with vanilla ice cream. Any ways me and Carryn skipped 5th, 6th and 7th periods. Thats the first time I have ever skipped class and it was amazing. We went and rented movies and I fell asleep during Wallace and Gromit due to the lack of sleep from the night before writting mrs. mulvey's damn english paper.
Saturday I clean my whole house it look like amazing and then Carryn came with a whole new birthday cake with an awesome iceing job which was cool. Ellery showed up and we watched more Wallace adn Gromit and the Kyle, Lara, adn Dennis came and we played monopoly until we were deserted and the game died. Erica took her slow ass tiem getting here but eventually came. Anyways lots of fun. Fingerpaiting my walls that now look amazing eventually I might post pictures of them. Almost getting killed cause Dennis couldn;t shut his mouth about black people in durham which is a bad idea. But yeah lot sof fun so thanks yous!!!!!
now I at laras and goign to Cary Academy tomorrow adn hopefully hiding out in the art rooms until Kitty and Mike pick me up and then its off to Wilmington for a couple days still not even sure when I am getting back from that and then my grandparents come next weekend. way too much is goign on. oh yeah its my birthday today 18 wow i really dont feel like today is any different than all the other days but at least its been a fun day so you know its better than probably teh last two birthday's I had that I dotn remember very well. |
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| 10:05pm 16/03/2006 |
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so two weeks ago I got really pissed at my step mom
this is the product of that anger...
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| 07:31am 20/02/2006 |
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mood: happy
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so I am way to lazy to describe this whole weekend but it was really quite an amazing weekend. And thanks to Kitty and Mike who picked me up really sweet of you guys!! so yeah really awesoem fun time this weekend hanging out with Kitty, Mike, and Justin and some other people who I kinda know and some i dont know.
<3 |
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| 03:53pm 04/02/2006 |
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mood:  hyper
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I GOT INTO ECU!!!!!
OMG SOOO HAPPY YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA!! |
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| 08:42pm 31/01/2006 |
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mood:  pensive
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so mixed news tonight
- my great aunt is doing well in kimo adn supposively has found some wigs that she is really happy with and she is feeling much better, but my great uncle is still not taking the news that she acutally has cancer very well at all so its a mixed situation.
- My Aunt Debbie's cat Ocean died. I really loved that cat he woudl come up adn sniff you face and rub his nose right at teh peak of you hair line he was so affectionate and sweet, but at least he got to pass away at home in a lovign environment and she didn't have to put him down.
- my 2nd cousin Eric is gettign married. This was really strange to hear considering I haven't talked to him in say 2 to 3 years. His wedding is in septemberso its still far away. I think they are expectign a kid sometime very soon. So hopefully my family will go to the wedding and see him again. |
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